Growing up I was always very close with my parents but I was especially close with my mom. We did so much together. I lived in a nice house, I had plenty of friends, we went on family beach vacations every year. I knew money was tight at times and sometimes I didn’t get things I needed, such as braces and it took a few years to finally get glasses. My parents fought at times but I knew that was normal and whatever problems they were having, they didn’t let me in on. Fast forward to my twenties. I met a great guy (who I’m engaged to now) and we dated, and after a year I moved in with him. Then came time for our families to meet which went super well and I was so excited for our future! After our parents had met twice, my dad called my boyfriends step dad to ask if he could borrow money. And it wasn’t a small amount. I was SO upset and above all I was embarrassed. I didn’t understand why they needed the money or why he thought it was appropriate to ask people who would probably be my in laws one day. I never got an answer as to why he did it, just reassurance that everything was okay. It clearly wasn’t. Things didn’t feel the same after that but I continued on like normal with them. A little while later, my dad informed me that my car (which was also in his name) was switching to another loan company for a lower monthly payment. I thought this was weird since I didn’t have much left to pay on the car, but it was my dad and I trusted what he was doing. Come to find out, he put my car up as collateral to secure a loan. I was now paying him monthly and he was supposed to apply that to my car balance. But since it was multiple loans all wrapped up in one, it wasn’t going directly to my car balance. I luckily got out of that mess, but my story is far from over. The next thing was I got a collections letter one day for almost $4,000. What the hell?? Turns out it was an unpaid college bill my parents were supposed to have taken care of and didn’t. Since it got sent to collections, that had a negative affect on my credit. He told me he would give me something towards it but I haven’t seen a dime. After some shady things, my boyfriends mom suggested I get copies of my credit which I had never done. I found a credit card on there that was opened in my name in 2009, just days after I turned 18. Payments stopped, it got sent to collections, but the amount wasn’t worth going after so that just got charged off as a bad debt. But still, I wasn’t the one who opened it and it negatively affected my credit. This next one is big. I started using credit karma to monitor things and one day in May I got a notification about an account that was now with collections. I called to get more info since I had no idea what it was. Come to find out, my parents had applied for a line of credit using my name and social, but the funds were deposited into THEIR bank account. They committed identity theft and fraud. I stopped speaking to them in November of 2018. I recently wrote them a letter basically saying I know what you’ve done and you can’t lie your way out of this. The amount of betrayal I feel from them is unimaginable. And here’s the real kicker...they’re going around telling people that the reason I don’t speak to them is because my fiancé is keeping me from my family. HAHAHAHAHA. My fiancé and his mom have had to get me out of these messes that they created! They’re completely in denial about what they’ve done. This has been such a long and messy process trying to get all of this cleared up. I haven’t filed a police report against them (which I’ve been told by many that I should), but instead I’m giving them the option to pay. It’s a shame that whatever circumstance they’re found themselves in they’re keeping from me instead of being honest. Maybe then we’d still have some kind of relationship. Some days I am still flat out angry, some days I cry, and some days I’m fine. Oh, and I’m also in the process of planning my wedding, which they aren’t invited to. I feel so taken advantage of. I’m so incredibly hurt by them and they just don’t seem to get it. They claimed everything was done with my best interest in mind. Ha. Also as I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized that any friend or close relative my parents had is no longer in the picture. My parents have literally burned the bridge with everyone. I found others that my parents asked to borrow money from and it rubbed people the wrong way. They’re so good at playing the victim and I believed my parents because back then what reason did I have not to? But boy, how things have changed. Some “family.”
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